August 2009
28 posts
I'm in a weird position, because I like rainbows,...
I like sports; I like professional football. I...
ashleykidwell:
Saying I apologize is the very same as saying I’m sorry, they’re the same. Unless you’re at a funeral.
-Demetri Martin
Swimming is a confusing sport. Sometimes you do it...
ashleykidwell:
Pants? Uh-oh. Bathing suit? Okay. Naked? We’ll see.
It’s like waking up in the morning; you have to check your outfit to make sure it’s cool. You know what I mean, like if I wake up with pajamas on I’m like ‘All right, I planned this.’ If you wake up and you’re naked; you gotta like check your surroundings. ‘Okay I’m naked…she’s pretty cute. What’s he doing here?’
-Demetri...
I went into a deli and got an egg sandwich and a...
When they were naming vitamins, they must have...
I like to stand near ATM machines, and when...
I like to do crafts. I work with glitter quite a...
I like the beach. I like to get there really early...
One of my friends has a stutter, and a lot of...
I heard this lady say "I love kids." That’s nice,...
I think vests are all about protection. You know...
I bought a dictionary. First thing I did was, I...
A couple weeks ago, I was on the street, and I saw...
About a month ago, I got a cactus, and a week...
Another term for balloon is bad breath holder.
I was in a store, and I saw a pocket...
If I have to move up in a building, I choose the...
I was in a card store, and there were these cards...
A drunk driver is very dangerous. So is a drunk...
I got some new pajamas with pockets in 'em. Which...
I wrapped my Christmas presents early this year,...
If I ever saw an amputee being hanged, I would...
"Sort of" is such a harmless thing to say. Sort...
Sometimes, when something really great happens to...
I think the worst time to have a heart attack is...
Whenever I'm on my computer, I don't type "lol". I...
I keep a lighter in my back pocket all the time....
